Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Announcing our Pregnancy...

 
This is the video we posted, along with a picture announcing our pregnancy on Facebook.  I was so nervous to post on Facebook because it felt like it was really "real" then (as silly as that sounds), but I decided that I want all the prayers we can get and what better way to ask for prayers than to ask on Facebook.  It has been a whirlwind experience the past few days and I feel very blessed that God has given us this opportunity. I pray our baby has a special plan on this earth because he/she is SO loved already and it melts my heart! I'll write more about our appointment and such later, but I just wanted to get the video and picture out :) Thank you for the continued prayers, well-wishes, and kind thoughts regarding our pregnancy- we are beginning a whole new journey and we all need prayers.  We love you guys! God bless!

Until Next Time, God bless...

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

11.5 Weeks...

With all of the thoughts and emotions going through my head, you would think I would know what to write, yet I feel stuck as to what to say. I always get bummed when other bloggers haven't written because I love reading their writing, so I figured I better update and let the blogging world know that things are going well! In addition, I do want to remember this time in my life and what has been going on, so I better write something... :)

After my 9 week ultrasound, I was on an absolute high! No matter what happened in life, nothing had the ability to knock me down because I was (still am) growing a baby. At times, it really doesn't feel real, but then I'll get sick, burp up something, or get up to go to the bathroom for the thousandth time and then I remember that I am pregnant. Despite the symptoms, I cannot complain because I would throw up multiple times a day if it meant that my baby was safe from harm.  One thing I never realized with pregnancy is how much you truly get up to go to the bathroom at night. Seriously, on average, I get up 3-4 times to go to the bathroom.  Please don't think I am complaining, because I am not at all, but yikes, I never sleep.  I did have my doctor check me for a bladder infection, but everything came back clear, so this is just part of the journey.  However, one night I didn't get up to go to the bathroom at all and I was totally freaked out. Our minds really make us crazy sometimes.  My poor husband said, "You were worried when you went to the bathroom too much and now you are worried that you didn't go at all... I can't keep up with you!" I think he is right- I can't keep up with myself. Nevertheless, the next night I was up a few times, so all is good!

When I first found out I was pregnant, I referred to the baby as Baby Jakubek, Baby J, or Jelly Bean (joke with my husband), but as we progress, I like to refer to it as "baby" and only baby. I don't know what it is, but it makes it feel more real, like there is a real baby inside me. I know that sounds absolutely goofy, even to me, but I don't know how else to explain it.

A week or so ago my husband sent me the most beautiful video that put me in tears within the first 15 seconds. It is about a couple who has waited for a baby and now the baby is finally here safe and sound.  Although our baby isn't in our arms, yet, it gave me hope to keep fighting for it and the future. I figured I would add the music video because the words are beautiful, but if you are struggling or have a hard time with pregnancy topics, please don't put yourself through it- I completely understand! Thank you for the e-mails and comments on my blog- they mean so much to me! I'll be 12 weeks on Friday and have my next big ultrasound on Monday, so please pray that things are going well and our baby is healthy! 

Until next time... God bless!                   

Monday, September 2, 2013

9 Weeks...

Well, it has been a couple of weeks since I've posted, and honestly, I'm just scared to believe that I am actually pregnant...even though my ultrasounds show I am. I think a lot of it has to deal with my past miscarriages and how they have robbed me of my innocence.  I love this baby SO incredibly much, more than I ever thought I could; he/she consumes my every thought and makes me giddy when I think about our little family.  I thought I was the only one, but I think it has hit Cory, too.  When we were shopping at Target, I started to browse the baby section, like I always do.   Normally Cory would roll his eyes and follow behind me, but on Saturday, he started looking at the strollers, picked one of them off the shelf, and said he found the perfect stroller for us.  It was this little gesture that made me smile.  Then today, as we were cleaning out my closet, he said, "I just know our baby is a boy and I am willing to bet on it." I think it goes to show that he is also thinking about out baby as much as I am :)

On Friday, August 30th, we had the opportunity to see our baby at the 9 week ultrasound.  I was so nervous going to the clinic because I was scared that we wouldn't see anything and because I didn't feel pregnant anymore. However, my fears were eased when we saw our precious little one, saw the heartbeat, and HEARD the heartbeat! I had no idea we would be able to hear it so soon, but it was the most amazing sound I have ever heard! I wish I would have recorded it, but I guess I'll do that next time. My mom and step-dad were also able to be with us, so that was pretty special for them!  The tears flooded for a long time and I didn't want to leave the clinic at all. 

In all this excitement, we have had some sad news; Cory's dad passed away on August 23rd, 2013 after a 5 month battle with lung cancer.  He did chemo for a few months and it all went away, but about a month ago it came back and had spread to his lymph nodes.  He went into hospice on the 21st and they told us he had anywhere form 4 weeks to 4 months to live. However, after we got up there at 3:30 on Friday and were able to spend a few hours with him, he passed away peacefully. I am at a loss that he is actually gone and that he won't be here for Cory or our future child. However, I know he is in heaven watching over all of us and keeping his loved ones close. Cory spoke at his funeral and it was an incredibly powerful message and I am so proud of him.  He said his dad gave him courage, which I couldn't agree more.  

Well, school starts tomorrow and I have fixed feelings about it.  Normally I am really excited, but I know how stressful it can be and I just don't want it to be too stressful where it can jeopardize my health.  I am trying to come up with a plan where I can take 10-15 minutes out of my day to just be... take in all that God has blessed us with and listen to the sounds of stillness. I am excited for the school year, but I am also apprehensive, too.

Until next time, God bless...

Without further adieu, here are a few pictures of our baby bean!
He/she measured 2.08 cm, and by the end of the week, he/she should be 2.25 cm or 1 inch!

  
The heartbeat was 178, so I'm predicting a girl, but honestly, I don't care what gender it is :)

Dr. Thorn said we needed to have a circular yolk sac and he was impressed with baby bean's! Uff-dah