Breaking it Down Part Three...

As I think about the next part of the poem, What God Meant, I can't help but think these statements are true for so many things in life and not just the journey I am on.

No, God never meant for me to not have children.

That's not my destiny; that's just a fork in the road I'm on.

I've been placed on the road less traveled, and like it or not, I'm a better person for it.

Clearly, God meant for me to develop more compassion, deeper courage, and greater inner strength on this journey to resolution, and I haven't let Him down.

As I think about this, there are many times I have had to take a different path in life or have been stuck in the middle of the road, without any clue as to which direction to go.  It was during those times that I had to put complete trust in God and the plan He had for me.  God has given me this challenge, or fork in the road, because He knows I am strong enough for it and He knows I will become a better person because of it.  What would life be like without any forks in the road or challenges? Wouldn't it be boring? Sure, it may be less painful, but it is through our pain that we learn who we really are and who is there for us no matter what.

I have always referred to our situation as a journey and it is through this journey, that we have had to make tough decisions, go through hard situations, and pave our own path,  for the hope that someday we will have our little one in our arms.  God did not mean that I won't have children, but He did mean that I would have to struggle a little more for it to happen.  God meant that my children will just take a little longer to get here, but they will be just as loved, if not more, than they ever would have been. 

So, whenever I am struggling or wondering "why" this had to happen, I just have to remind myself that God has a better plan to make me an even better person and mommy and I will not let Him down because He is the ultimate, our Savior, and the one who died for our sins to be forgiven.  Although His journey may be different than the one I had planned, ultimately, He knows what is best for me.  

Until next time, God bless!